Unmerited fears ... continued...
on 01-12-2009 at 11:00 PM (95 Views)
So, I was reading my 'sister's blog today and decided that I really shouldn't comment there... or on my family blog, so here I am...
First off this has to with the blog I wrote a couple of months back... you can read the whole thing here
Yes I know that Grams can multiply her love for grandkids... biological or not... But I didn't think I would feel so torn up over Aunt 'R' Who wrote in her blog today... I will quote from it as I don't really want to post a lot of personal things...
"While 'B' was in South Africa I got to feel “junior” kick. It was so amazing and filled my heart with joy. I can’t wait to meet this precious baby boy, only four more months! He is already stubborn. We were watching TV and the baby was kicking and jumping all around; we decided he already likes chocolate cake just like his mom! As soon as I put my hand on 'B'’s stomach he stopped. So I was patient and waiting and waiting for him to move at last he did. I can’t wait to hear this little one cry and one day say Aunt 'R'."
So how does this make me feel? She already is Aunt 'R' to my kids! She was there the day that Faith was born! She made it a point to come visit us here 2000 miles away from Grams (and her American home) at Christmas time! UGH!!! This is NOT the first that she will be an aunt (as a commenter implied)!
So now I wonder if I get to be an Aunt or not, do I even matter... or am I just the bum who moved in with the family in HS?
I wish I could say something... but I'm afraid that it would be taken the wrong way... I'm afraid that I would not say something in love, but in jealousy and that's not right.... so I will keep my mouth shut (well except for here, but this blog is for me), continue with my plans to crochet 'B' a baby blanket and pray that I can get pregnant again soon (that has very little to do with 'B,' 'R' or with Grams, it's just when emotions are running that seems to surface
Again I say... UGH!!!
No comments:
Post a Comment